“You’re not grown!” “I’m more grown than you!” “I’m grown!”
Have you ever heard these phrases before? I’ve been toggling with this word, grown, for the past couple of years, trying to understand its meaning. Personally, I hold this conversation piece dear to my heart because I have had numerous instances where others have looked at me as though I were not “grown.” When I try to gain clarity, I never get a clear-cut answer; no one is willing to expound, only allude to certain facts. Since I am one who reads between the lines, I draw my own conclusions: Becaues I don’t have children or husband I am looked at as having less responsibilities; I am “less grown.” Ok, I know this statement is very bold; however, it’s from personal experiences and observations that I stand on this belief.
My definition of being grown: It is a person who exudes maturity and takes care of his or her responsibilities (no matter how big or small it may seem)—key words are maturity and responsibility.
If we are to measure my definition against another’s assessment of “being grown,” we would see a vast inconsistency. In my opinion, to imply that someone is mature and responsible JUST because they have children, husband or wife is foolish. Anyone can make a baby and get married, but what he or she does to nurture and care for that child or make that marriage work, will qualify them as ‘GROWN’ and MATURE. Again, you can have grown-up responsibilities and still not be viewed as “grown” because you’re not consistent or handling them properly. You can have ten children and not take care of any of them; you can own a home and miss payments left and right because you’re out squandering money—you see what I’m saying?—grown up responsibilities being mishandled.
I hope I didn’t lose anyone, but I have experienced and witnessed this several times in the past: others having a baby and automatically be considered grown when they haven’t earned that title; those in positions of authority disrespecting those who seem to have fewer responsibilities; and individuals older in age believing they can say or do whatever because they are “grown.” I’m a big girl now…who demands respect. We must BREAK THIS HABIT and love and respect others in their journeys of life, not belittling each other.
What are your thoughts??
Make sure you stay tuned for my new book 11-11-11
11-11-11-Mark you calendars ❤