Tag Archives: marriage

Good Education + Grades=?

Attributed to: bc.edu

Yesterday evening I was reflecting on my life and all the values instilled in me at an early age. Even more, I began thinking about the saying repeated over and OVER again: “Lakia, you better go to school and get good grades so that you can get a good job with benefits.”

As a child I held tight to those values and entering college, searched out careers that would help me secure a “good job with benefits.” Nowadays, that word is very almost nonexistent. Companies are plummeting and job security (being able to retire and receive benefits) as we know it is flaky. I have seen people put over twenty years of hard work and dedication into their jobs only to have the Supervisor sit them down to say: “Option #1: We cut your salary in half or Option #2:  Take a voluntary layoff so we can replace you with a younger person who can deliver the same results for a less salary.” Is this what I have to look forward to?

We are living in a time where the formula used back then (Good education+ Good grades= Good job with benefits) is slowly dissolving. The “secret formula” isn’t cutting it. Now, the method may very well be: Good education (college, university or vocation) + Good ole hard work= Entrepreneurship. As I wrote in my Facebook status last night, when I’m fortunate to have children, I want to present to them the optional formula: Get educated and then create your own jobs and also for other people!

Challenge question:

What if the “secret formula” isn’t working? (Just Over Broke=JOB) What if someone else created the formula and you aren’t happy, financially free or just don’t fit the mold? I challenge you, reevaluate the “formula” you were given or suggested. My heart always told me entrepreneurship, but everyone else said JOB because it was all they knew and were told. Even if it’s not for you, make sure you aren’t pushing your formula on others, but allowing them to create their own.

If you would like to see what’s going on in my entrepreneurial life, check out my new book  The Truth about Ugly Women: I Want Beauty Within www.thetruthaboutuglywomen.com, and my company– Unwrapped International– website www.unwrappedinternational.com



Filed under Inspiration

Dear Daddy or Daddy to Be

I decided to write a letter. No, it’s not Father’s Day, but I thought I would appreciate and say thank you. Over the last couple of months I have seen many blogs, articles and especially Facebook statuses from hurting women because men weren’t doing what they were supposed to do… be a FATHER. So, it was refreshing to see a new dad gush with excitement about his first born child; his status lit up my day so much that I had to write this letter.


Dear Daddy or Daddy to Be–

 I am writing with great joy to congratulate you on the new addition to your family. Whether you are a father or soon to be, I am so excited to take part in your joy. You see, your excitement comes at a time where I was losing hope for the children being brought into this world. To listen to the news, watch television, read blogs or even get on Facebook was a pain at times. Statuses filled with hate, criticism, judgment and ridicule highlighted the wounds of mothers across the country crying out for their child to be loved by their father, haunted me.  Catchphrases such as: Deadbeat daddy; No good; Running from responsibilities; Sperm donors, along with many other painful words, were prevalent. These words were real, heartfelt and statistically setting the stage for children to possibly experience higher rates of poverty, crime, drug and alcohol abuse, emotional and behavioral problems and lower educational achievement. For any woman it causes you to pose the question, “Are there are any good men in this world left to conceive a child with?”

But you, Daddy or Daddy to be, the one gushing and gleaming with great pride and joy, you make my heart, along with many others, smile. You prove to the world that there are good men and you add to the vast, unnoticed population of already dedicated fathers. Your participation throughout their entire life (not just the beginning months or years) encourages us never to lose hope because your presence emotionally (not just financially) breaks the stigma.

 As a future mother, thank you for giving us hope.

 Ps: Never lose your zeal.

 I talk more about the power of a father’s presence in a woman’s life in my new book The Truth about Ugly Women: I Want Beauty Within. Check it out: www.thetruthaboutuglywomen.com

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Filed under Inspiration